Epiphany of time.

Perhaps its because yesterday was my birthday or because it's come up in the book I'm reading, but the question of why time doesn't flow backwards, only forwards came up in conversation with Jim yesterday. It came up as an offshoot to talking about the type of content he wanted to have on his new blog and I suggested the topic of time flow among other things.

I talked myself into a tangent because I believe both of us feel that time is an arbitrary measurement that is necessary for rules that have to be observed, like motion. It's rather silly to think about a physical action that doesn't have a length of time involved with it or that is measureable but if you elevate that to something that is say a discussion of the actions you live your life by, or more philosophical, then time loses it's meaning a bit.

That lead to a discussion about personality and consciousness because I had a bit of an insight the other day among all the new babies. All of us have a memory of when we can start to recall things as children. Jim can remember things very early; I start to have memories from when I was around five or six. My personality was pretty much set by the time I was seven and Jim agreed for himself too, stating that the things he thinks then are close to the things he thinks now.

When you see a baby, it really doesn't seem that aware and until it gets a bit older, it doesn't seem to have much personality. Why do we then believe that a consciousness has been dumped on that baby at the get-go? Why couldn't it be something that is doled out over time, and for some people they would get a bigger portion, especially if they were paying attention to it. This would explain why people who are deep thinkers have that capacity and why some ditzy people go through life never asking why.

Consciousness then becomes something that is perhaps trainable, similar to how you would exercise your muscles to take on more load or achieve better endurance. I know that the more I think about how my mind works beyond just the basics (which I believe are hardcoded, like the need to eat, sleep, etc.) the more it wants to think about those things.

The frustrating thing to me is that whenever it seems I'm close to a point of clarity about how my higher brain works, I'll get distracted by the hardcoded side which last night was hunger. For close to an hour though, Jim and I worked out new theories as to why we functioned the way we did and was that influenced by environment. It reminded me of some of the discussions I've been able to be a part of at college or at writer's conferences and I remarked that it was a bit sad that those sort of discussions didn't seem to be encouraged in this part of the world. I know thats a large statement but I meant in our circle of friends and certainly I don't hear a lot of deep thoughts going on at work (there is no time!).

So to bring the thought of time in a circle which I can only apparently do theoretically (at this point of my existence anyway), I would not want time to flow backwards. Can you imagine if all of a sudden it reversed like the poles sometimes flip-flop?